The Gospel of the Covenant Marriage

This exploration of biblical marriage reveals how the relationship between God and His people is reflected in the covenant of marriage, demonstrating that marriage is designed to be a living illustration of Christ's relationship with the Church. Through examining both Old Testament imagery of Israel as Yahweh's bride and New Testament teachings about Christ and the Church, we discover that biblical marriage carries profound spiritual significance beyond its practical function. The article demonstrates how husbands and wives, through their distinct roles and unified purpose, can embody and proclaim the gospel message in their marriage relationship.

Transcript:

We’re continuing our series, The Gospel is Bigger Than You Think. We’ve talked about the gospel proper—the story of Jesus—that Jesus is King. That’s the good news. Jesus is King. But as you come to submit to Jesus as King, the gospel has effects.

Today and next week, we’ll focus on one big idea related to God’s family—specifically, Christ’s marriage to His church. Today, we’ll talk about this, and next week, we’ll focus on the concept of being children of God or sons of God. These two ideas fit together to form a gospel motif of God’s family. Today, we’re focusing on the covenant of marriage in light of God and His people.

When we talk about God’s work in the world, I believe there’s significant continuity between how God worked with His people in the Old Testament and how He works with His people in the New Testament. There are certainly differences, but I want to highlight the consistent heart and work of God throughout all time and history.

Let’s begin in the Old Testament with the idea of Israel as the Bride of Yahweh or the Bride of God. You’ve likely heard the idea that the church is the Bride of Christ. But here’s the question: Is Israel God’s Bride?

If you look at Ezekiel 16, starting in verse 8, it says:

"Then I passed by you and saw you, and you were indeed at the age for love. So I spread the edge of my garment over you and covered your nakedness. I pledged myself to you, entered into a covenant with you. This is the declaration of the Lord God, and you became mine. I washed you with water, rinsed off your blood, and anointed you with oil. I clothed you in embroidered cloth and provided you with fine leather sandals. I also wrapped you in fine linen and covered you with silk. I adorned you with jewelry, putting bracelets on your wrists and a necklace around your neck. I put a ring in your nose, earrings on your ears, and a beautiful crown on your head. So you were adorned with gold and silver, and your clothing was made of fine linen, silk, and embroidered cloth. You ate fine flour, honey, and oil. You became extremely beautiful and attained royalty. Your fame spread among the nations because of your beauty, for it was perfect through my splendor, which I had bestowed on you" (Ezekiel 16:8–14, CSB).

If it weren’t for the declaration, "This is the declaration of the Lord God," you might think this was a description of a husband taking a bride—bringing her into covenant, providing for her, blessing her, and adorning her to make her famous and beautiful among the people. But this is Yahweh’s declaration to His people, Israel.

Yahweh says Israel was "at the age for love," indicating it was time for marriage. Israel existed as a people long before they became a nation. Back in Abraham’s day, God promised that a great nation would come from him—a nation that would bless all nations. Even in the days of the man Israel (Jacob), his sons, wives, and descendants formed a people. But it wasn’t until the Exodus, when Moses led them out of Egypt, that Israel began to be organized as a nation under their God.

This passage likely reflects the period from the Exodus to their entry into the Promised Land under Joshua. When God says, "You were at the age for love," it signifies a time when Israel, as a people, was ready for a covenant relationship with Him.

At Mount Sinai, Moses received the Ten Commandments and presented them to the people, saying, "This is the law that Yahweh your God has given to you." The people responded, "We will do everything that is in the law." That covenant marked the "marriage" between God and His people.

Before Israel was formally organized as a nation, it’s likely that, without the law of Yahweh, the Israelites were living in Egypt and engaging in all sorts of questionable behaviors. They were probably worshiping Egyptian gods at times and doing things that were far from God’s will. But in Ezekiel, Yahweh is saying that it’s all water under the bridge. He’s bringing them into covenant with Himself, covering their shame and nakedness.

It’s a lot like a couple preparing for marriage. If you’ve been married in a Christian setting, you’ve likely gone through premarital counseling. Part of that process often involves discussing each other’s histories. Not everyone makes good decisions as young people, and the point is to deal with any "baggage" before entering the marriage. You bring everything into the light—sometimes with a counselor—and when you enter the covenant of marriage, you agree not to bring up those past issues anymore. You move forward together, renewed and purified.

Similarly, Yahweh covers the sins of Israel—their past failures—before entering the covenant. He says, "I pledged myself to you, and you became mine." This signifies the covenant promise of forgiveness, where God declares that He won’t bring up their sins again. He then blesses Israel as part of the covenant. He puts sandals on her feet, adorns her with jewelry, and even says she attains royalty.

If Yahweh is King—and this ties back to the good news of Jesus, that Jesus is King—then Yahweh’s bride, Israel, becomes the queen. Whoever marries a king becomes royalty. Israel’s royal status is a direct result of her covenant relationship with Yahweh.

However, once lifted to this high status, it can be easy to forget how they got there. Israel begins to believe that their royal status was something they earned. Ezekiel 16:15 continues:

"But you trusted in your beauty and acted like a prostitute because of your fame. You lavished your sexual favors on everyone who passed by. Your beauty became his. You took some of your clothing and made colorful high places for yourself, and you engaged in prostitution with them. These places should not have been built, and this should never have happened. You also took your beautiful jewelry made from gold and silver that I had given you and made male images so that you could engage in prostitution with them. Then you took your embroidered clothing to cover them and set my oil and incense before them. The food that I gave you—the fine flour, oil, and honey that I fed you—you set it before them as a pleasing aroma. That is what happened. This is the declaration of the Lord God. You even took your sons and daughters that you bore to Me and sacrificed them to these images as food. Wasn't your prostitution enough? You slaughtered My children and gave them up when you passed them through the fire to the images."

Israel doesn’t just fall into idolatry—they fall into horribly immoral practices, including the worship of pagan gods and even sacrificing their children. But notice the root cause: Yahweh says, "You trusted in your beauty."

Israel was supposed to trust in Yahweh, who had given them everything. Instead, they started to believe that they had earned their beauty and status. This pride led them into what Yahweh describes as prostitution or adultery. They thought, "If we got this from Yahweh, what else can we gain from the other gods?" They acted as if their blessings came from themselves and sought more from idols.

They even made male images—clear references to idolatry—and built places of worship for pagan gods. It wasn’t enough to worship existing gods; they created new idols to worship. It’s tragic because all good things come from Yahweh, yet they sought spiritual fulfillment in every other place imaginable—even fabricating gods to meet their desires.

This reminds me of what we see in some tribal cultures—animism, the belief that there’s a god in everything. Israel’s idolatry mirrors that same misguided pursuit of spirituality, completely forgetting that their blessings came from Yahweh, who had already covered their shame and provided for them.

Because they were pursuing these things—seeking after them and creating gods out of everything to get what they could from the spirit world—they forgot that all good things come from Yahweh. The only God they ever needed to worship was the one who had given Himself for them, who brought them to Himself. They just needed to stay home with their one God—Israel, as queen, with her one husband, the King.

This is the gospel: worshiping other gods doesn’t work. When you don’t follow the King, when you don’t stay bound in covenant relationship with Him, when you don’t stay bound to Christ, what happens? You turn to the world, pursuing wealth, comfort, provision, or whatever you think you’re lacking. If you don’t believe you’re getting it from Jesus, you go out and chase it elsewhere. You get a little, but it’s never enough, so you keep going after more and more.

This endless pursuit of "more," what we sometimes call the American Dream, is nothing more than the tribal animism we see in some third-world cultures. It’s still a pursuit of more—a desperate attempt to gain satisfaction from spirits or idols that will never be enough.

But Christ stands before you as King, bringing you into covenant with Himself. He says He’s sufficient. He’s enough. He tells us, "Seek first the kingdom of God, and all these things will be added to you." There’s nothing you need to seek outside of Christ.

Ezekiel also mentions that they took their sons and daughters. This likely includes references to child sacrifice, as seen a few times in Leviticus. But there’s also a broader implication here: what I would call generational apostasy. If you aren’t following Christ in your family, it’s unlikely your children will.

When a husband is dedicated to Jesus, and his wife comes alongside him in submission, together they follow Christ as one. Their children see this, witness its beauty, and understand that everything their parents need is bound up in following Jesus. They’re far more likely to desire the same for themselves. If the King is Jesus for the husband and the wife, then He will probably be King for their kids, too.

I say "probably" because every child is unique. Even my three kids, raised in the same home, are completely different. But here’s what I know: if neither the husband nor wife follows Jesus, their kids likely won’t either. Unless they find Him outside the home, it’s unlikely they’ll follow Him at all.

And I’m not just talking about going to church. That’s not enough. I’m talking about the day-to-day life at home—how your family operates after school, after work, in the evenings, on vacations, or even while grocery shopping. Do your kids see you following Jesus in those moments? That’s what I mean by generational apostasy. Taking them to church isn’t enough. Healing generational apostasy requires daily submission to Christ as King.

If you’re a husband, here’s a hard truth: if your wife is the spiritual leader in your family, don’t expect your sons to follow Jesus. Unless they marry a godly woman who carries their faith when they can’t—which isn’t guaranteed—they probably won’t follow Him. The biblical model we’re about to see is of a faithful husband who leads his wife, so together they lead their family.

Nothing drives children away from Christ more than hypocrisy at home—when parents worship themselves or their own interests instead of Jesus.

But there’s grace for this. Israel ran from Yahweh in morbid foolishness, abandoning all that was good to cling to what was destructive. Yahweh would’ve been perfectly just to say, "I forgave your past sins, brought you into covenant with Me, and you left again." He could’ve left Israel in her apostasy and adultery, saying, "You got what you deserved."

But He doesn’t.

He brings more grace. There is grace within the covenant marriage between God and His people—grace for covenant unfaithfulness, for spiritual adultery, if you will. Look at Hosea. Hosea was a prophet of Yahweh, a faithful, God-fearing man living his life exactly as we’ve described a husband should live. And yet, God told him to take a wife of prostitution.

In the ancient world, a woman who had sex before marriage was unlikely ever to marry. She would likely remain in her father’s house, dependent on others—a drain on society, as it was viewed then. And it’s in this context that God says, "Go get someone like that. Someone everyone thinks is impure and immoral, who has lived a shameful life. I want you to take her as your wife."

Her name is Gomer. Now, we don’t know what the name means, but it’s safe to say it’s not a name most would choose for their daughters. Regardless, Gomer symbolizes the spiritual promiscuity of Israel—her unfaithfulness to Yahweh through idolatry and spiritual adultery.

After marrying Hosea and having three children, Gomer leaves him, committing adultery and taking their children with her. Their children—symbolically named Jezreel, No Compassion, and No Mercy—bear significance in the story. Jezreel represents the prophecy of Israel’s destruction in the Jezreel Valley. No Compassion and No Mercy symbolize God’s judgment on Israel’s unfaithfulness, a reflection of the consequences of their sin.

When Gomer leaves, this becomes a picture of generational apostasy. She doesn’t leave the children with faithful Hosea; she takes them into her sin. As parents, this is what we do when we fail to live godly lives at home. Our children follow us into sin. If your role is to raise them in godliness, but you lead them in ungodliness, you are pulling them down a path that leads away from Christ.

Despite the destructive nature of Gomer’s sin, Hosea loves her again. Look at Hosea 3:1:

"Then the Lord said to me, 'Go again. Show love to a woman who is loved by another man and is an adulteress, just as the Lord loves the Israelites, though they turn to other gods.'"

Hosea buys Gomer out of prostitution. He goes and pays for her freedom, likely giving up everything he owns. Imagine what a prophet of God earns—it probably wasn’t much. He pays the price, takes her home, takes the children home, and makes her his bride again, renewing their covenant relationship.

In Hosea 3:4–5, we see the larger picture:

"For the Israelites must live many days without king or prince, without sacrifice or sacred pillar, and without ephod or household idols. Afterward, the people of Israel will return and seek the Lord their God and David their king. They will come with awe to the Lord and to His goodness in the last days."

This is a messianic prophecy, pointing forward to Jesus—the human king, the Son of Man, and the divine king, the Son of God. We live in these last days, where God is bringing His adulterous bride back home. If you are in Christ, if you have submitted your life to Him and proclaimed that Jesus is King, then that’s you.

Just as in the Old Testament, Israel is Yahweh’s bride, in the New Testament, the church is the bride of Christ.

How is the church God’s bride? First, a husband’s love reflects Christ’s love for the church.

Ephesians 5:25 says:

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her."

This verse highlights the sacrificial nature of a husband’s love. Just as Christ gave up His very life for the church, so a husband is called to love his wife. In Ezekiel, we see Yahweh’s sacrificial love, pouring out blessings upon blessings. He gives His bride not only what she needs but more than enough, adorning her with jewels and elevating her to a place of honor. She isn’t just His wife; she’s His queen, famous among the nations.

As Israel is adorned among the nations, Christ adorns His church in majesty and glory. This is what husbands are called to do: sacrifice themselves for their wives, just as Christ sacrificed for His people. Husbands are to love sacrificially, reflecting Christ’s love.

Further, a husband is called to make his wife holy. This idea can make some women uncomfortable, but consider how challenging this is for husbands. Ephesians 5:26 says:

"Husbands, love your wives, to make her holy, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word."

This passage has sparked a lot of strange interpretations, but I believe Ezekiel provides the context for understanding it. In Ezekiel 16:9 and 13, Yahweh says:

"I washed you with water, rinsed off your blood, and anointed you with oil... You became extremely beautiful and attained royalty."

This imagery reflects a ritual of holiness, a setting apart and making new. It involves anointing and the language of entering into a covenant relationship. I believe Paul has this passage in mind when he speaks of making a wife holy, cleansing her with the washing of the word. Ezekiel’s imagery connects to ancient marriage ceremonies, which often included rituals of washing and anointing.

The reference to rinsing off blood implies purification from past sins, including premarital unfaithfulness. Yahweh’s act of cleansing Israel represents His forgiveness and His refusal to hold their past against them. Paul applies this to Christ’s relationship with the church and, by extension, to a husband’s role in marriage.

For husbands, this means not holding past wrongs over their wives. If issues were confessed before marriage, they should never be brought up again. The covenant of marriage is a new beginning, and the husband’s role is to wash away the past in holiness.

The imagery of anointing is also significant. In ancient weddings, a day of ritual bathing often preceded the marriage ceremony, and the husband would anoint his bride with oil. This act symbolized the bride leaving her father’s house and becoming part of her husband’s household.

Consider the word "anointing" in light of its connection to Christ. Jesus is the Messiah, the Anointed One of God. When He brings the church into covenant with Himself, He anoints His bride with oil. Paul’s language about making a wife holy, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word, carries this sense of anointing. It’s not about asserting authority or superiority over a wife; it’s about lifting her up, building her up, and making her a queen.

This helps address concerns about the relationship between husbands and wives. The roles of headship and submission, often misunderstood, aren’t about control or subjugation. If a husband is a righteous king, seeking to elevate his wife as a purified and honored queen, submission becomes neither dangerous nor oppressive.

Of course, there are many "what if" questions that arise—situations where things don’t align ideally. Those are valid concerns, but they’re not the focus here. If you have specific questions, feel free to text me on Band, email, or call, and we can discuss them further.

This principle of anointing and building up applies to wives as well. Ephesians 5:22–24 says:

"Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord, because the husband is the head of the wife, just as Christ is the head of the church."

Submission, like headship, is often misunderstood, but it works beautifully within the framework of mutual love and sacrificial care.

He is the Savior of the body. Now, as the church submits to Christ, so also wives are to submit to their husbands in everything. This is not a prescription for blind or absolute obedience. It’s a king-and-queen relationship, not a master-and-slave dynamic.

Nowhere in this passage is submission equated with servitude. Instead, this is a partnership where the wife lets the husband lead because he is leading like a righteous, loving king. This exchange has often been described as one of love and respect, and I think that’s exactly right. For the wife, the sentiment behind "submit to your husbands" is respect.

In Ezekiel, Israel’s failure with Yahweh stemmed from her decision to act as though she were the boss—as though all blessings came from her own efforts. Israel forgot her covenant with Yahweh and fell into apostasy. Similarly, Paul calls wives to maintain respect for their husbands, acknowledging the covenant they share and the blessings within it. This respect says, "Thank you for leading our family, for working hard, for providing and protecting."

When the husband loves his wife as Christ loves the church, this respect flows naturally, and the relationship is not dangerous. But when a husband fails to love, a wife trying to respect can feel manipulated. If you’re navigating a difficult scenario like this, we can talk through it together.

There’s a mystery to marriage—when it’s done right, it is absolutely beautiful. Paul emphasizes this mystery in Ephesians 5:32:

"This mystery is profound, and I am talking about Christ and the church."

Your marriage is about something much bigger than personal happiness or practicality. It’s a way to proclaim the gospel of Jesus Christ.

In a culture that discourages women from trusting their husbands, that says, "You don’t need him; he needs you," this biblical model may seem dangerous or outdated. But it preaches the gospel when a wife can say, "My husband loves me like Christ loves the church. I have no fear in letting him lead. He cares for me, he adorns me, and he loves me in ways that reflect Christ’s love for His church."

Marriage becomes a powerful testimony of the gospel, speaking in ways that words alone sometimes cannot.

Look at 2 Corinthians 11:2:

"For I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy, because I have promised you in marriage to one husband—to present a pure virgin to Christ."

Paul’s words echo what we saw in Ezekiel. There’s a cleansing and purification that takes place, a washing away of the past to enter into covenant together. Just as a wife is presented as a pure bride to her husband, the church is presented as a pure bride to Christ.

Husbands and wives, when operating as God designed, become living illustrations of how Christ relates to His church. This is the profound mystery of marriage.

In ancient settings, a wife’s role was often tied to providing sons for her husband. Lineage and inheritance were everything in that culture. But today, while the cultural expression of marriage may differ, the underlying truth remains: marriage is meant to reflect the covenant love of Christ and His church, demonstrating His sacrificial love and our faithful response.

If a family didn’t have sons, there was no one to carry on the family name. In the ancient world, this was one of the most important roles a wife could fulfill for her husband. In a similar way, when the church is in the right position before Christ—this might be a new thought for some of you—the church "births" sons of God for Christ’s eternal kingdom.

Everyone wants their marriage to work. And every Christian wants the church to function well, don’t they? Marriages that reflect the gospel of Jesus Christ are marriages that work. There is no advice from the world, no marriage counseling or tips, that surpasses the example of how Christ loves the church.

If you have your slides open, you’ll see a shameless plug for our upcoming marriage conference. This event focuses on the very idea we’ve been discussing—that marriage reflects the covenant nature of Christ and His church. I can’t cover it all in one message, so this conference is designed to show you practical ways your marriage can thrive when built on the foundation of Jesus Christ.

Whether you’re married, preparing for marriage, or hope to be married someday, I encourage you to sign up. We’ve kept the cost as low as possible—likely losing money on it—because this isn’t just pastoral work; it’s gospel work for the kingdom of God. Before you leave the park today, sign up. This is for your marriage and for the kingdom of God. I believe it’s that important.

I’ll admit, I feel a little ashamed that we haven’t hosted this kind of marriage conference before. It’s that crucial.

Biblical Marriage Reflects the Gospel

How does the church "birth" sons of God? Biblical marriage reflects the gospel. Look at Hosea 1:10:

"The number of the Israelites will be like the sand of the sea, which cannot be measured or counted. And in the place where they were told, 'You are not my people,' they will be called, 'Sons of the living God.'"

This references the Abrahamic covenant, where God promised Abraham that his descendants would be countless. Despite Israel’s rebellion—like Gomer’s unfaithfulness in Hosea’s story—God declares that where condemnation should have occurred, restoration happens. Israel would not only be restored but would also give birth to sons of God.

The same is true for the church today. When the church submits to God’s will, it produces sons of God.

You might ask, "How does that happen?" Let’s reflect for a moment. Have you ever thought marriage should be 50/50? Maybe you’ve felt like you were giving 60% while your spouse gave only 40%, or perhaps you’ve experienced seasons where it was 80/20. Some of you might be in marriages where you feel like you’re giving everything, and your spouse is giving nothing.

But marriage isn’t supposed to be 50/50. Imagine if society only required us to follow the law 50% of the time. What kind of world would that be? It would be chaotic and unlivable. Similarly, marriage isn’t about meeting halfway. It’s about a covenant where each person gives fully, reflecting the selfless love of Christ.

This applies to church and faith, too. People often say, "You need balance in life. Don’t let church become too consuming." But biblical priorities don’t work like that. Jesus isn’t just one of your priorities—He’s the foundation of all of them.

For example, your spouse might be your first priority, and that’s good—as long as Jesus is your first priority in your marriage. Your kids might be important, and they should be—as long as Jesus is your first priority in your parenting. Whether it’s your job, your relationships, or any other aspect of life, Christ must be supreme. In everything, Christ is at the center.

In my job, Christ is supreme. In my ministry, Christ is supreme. Christ is all in all. He’s in everything I do. Marriage reflects this—it’s not 50/50; it’s 100/100. Christ is always 100% for us. Everything Jesus does, 100% of the time, is filtered through His love for the church. He never acts selfishly or misguidedly; everything He does is for the good of His people.

If that’s true, then everything we do as the church should be filtered through the lens of how Christ leads us. We are called to submit to Christ in everything. This isn’t a 50/50 partnership—it’s being 100% for Christ and His purpose, His kingdom, in all that we do.

In John 20:21, Jesus said:

"As the Father has sent me, I also send you."

There’s no slide for this; I added it here. How does Jesus lead us? He came into the world proclaiming the kingdom of God. How do we follow? As Jesus was sent into the world, so He sends us into the world. We submit to Christ as His bride, the church, by going out and proclaiming the gospel: Jesus is King, and the kingdom of God has come.

That’s why the Great Commission in Matthew 28:19–20 says:

"Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe everything I have commanded you."

This is how we make sons of God—by following the work Jesus began. He has claimed us as His covenant people and called His church to be His faithful bride, going forth to bring many sons into the kingdom.

Next week, we’ll dive into what it means to be children of God. In that step, we’ll uncover some practical ways this gospel effect of Jesus as King plays out. We’ll pause here for now and come back next week to worship together and learn more about what it means to be sons and daughters of God.

Prayer

Lord, I pray for the marriages represented here today. May they look to Your kingship—the kingship of Christ—and see how He has loved His people throughout all time, through Israel and through the church. We believe that 100% of the time, You are working for the good of Your people.

I pray this would inspire husbands here to pour themselves out, to sacrifice themselves for the good of their wives, following the example of Christ. Lord, I also pray for the wives, that as they see their husbands following Jesus as King, they would embrace the model of the church, giving themselves over to their husbands as their husbands lead them in righteousness.

I pray for safety and trust in this biblical model of marriage, that it would flourish in our lives and churches. May our marriages proclaim the gospel, standing out as something special—distinct from marriages in the world. May they cause the world to marvel at the beauty of what You have built into marriage within Your church.

Lord, may these marriages not be seen as anomalies but as clear evidence of the work of our glorious King and Christ. Through them, may the gospel go forth, shining as a witness to Your goodness and glory.

We pray all this in Jesus’ name. Amen.